The National Lampoon Sports Minute (Or So) is a weekly short that mocks everything sport. Created by Steve Hofstetter and written by a staff of comedians, the Minute is syndicated weekly by 169 radio stations, 42 newspapers, and 15 websites.

Friday, 07/03/2009
Kobe Bryant decided to take a pass on terminating the final two years of his contract. It's the first time in his career he's ever passed anything. Daniel and Henrik Sedin have agreed to identical five-year contract extensions with the Vancouver Canucks. The contracts look so much alike that only the Sedin's parents can tell them apart. Venus and Serena Williams will face off in the Wimbledon Finals. It's so exciting that Anna Kournikova may stop selling popcorn at the event to watch. The Mets ended their skid after Jerry Manuel called a team meeting. And in order to have most of the team attend, it was held at the doctor's office. And Milwaukee Brewers prospect Jeremy Jeffress was suspended for 100 games after his third violation of baseball's drug policy. Because nothing is better for a drug user than months of free time.